Hey! That's My Line!
by bloodsucking vampire girl
Summary: Harry suddenly finds himself spewing random quotes that his enemies used in the many life-and-death situations he has been in. "Master I cannot hold him!" "I did not ask you to hold Mr. Malfoy, Potter, I simply asked you to apologize to him!"


Light burst through the darkness that had settled in his mind and Harry felt a dull ache begin to form between his temples. Groaning, he sat up, rubbing his head.

"Wha – what happened?" he asked, his voice slightly shaky. He felt slightly dazed and the ache from before had begun to turn into a full-blown headache.

"Why's it so damn blurry?" he grumbled, struggling to see.

"Maybe because you aren't wearing your glasses" said a prim voice from beside him. A moment later said item was being handed to him. He took it with a quiet "thanks" and put it on.

Instantly the room came into focus. He was in the hospital wing. Groaning, he closed his eyes and leaned against the bed.

"What did I do this time?" he asked.

"Nothing mate! It was that damn Snape - stupid bastard, I bet he was trying to kill you!" Ron ranted, his eyes burning with rage.

"Ron!" snapped Hermione, who had been the one to hand him his glasses. "Don't be stupid."

"Stupid!" Ron roared. "You saw what he did Hermione – giving Harry that potion, he was probably trying to poison him!"

"Ron" Hermione dragged out his name through gritted teeth. "How could he have been trying to poison Harry if _Harry _made the potion?"

"Snape's supposed to be an expert at potions isn't he? He should have known that Harry's potion was poison!"

_"Harry's potion was not poison!"_

A groan from said person stopped the fighting.

"Oh Harry, are you alright?" Hermione asked, instantly going into mother hen mode.

"I'm fine" Harry replied. "What's this I heard about Snape poisoning me?"

Ron opened his mouth to answer but Hermione cut him off with one fierce look.

"He didn't do anything of the sort Harry" Hermione said, turning back to him. She tensed slightly at Ron's scoff but didn't say anything. "He asked you to drink your potion in front of the class; probably to cause you some humiliation, which I admit is wrong – stop giving me that look Ronald! – and it had ill effects on you. You fainted."

Oh. That was probably where the headache had come from.

"I'm fine though" Harry said, after a moment. "It was probably nothing."

Hermione looked uncertain but nodded her head. Ron scowled.

"This wouldn't have happened if it hadn't been for that slimy bastard."

_"Ron!" _snapped Hermione. "You _cannot _talk about teachers that way!"

And so the fighting resumed.

* * *

><p>It was only the next day that Madame Pomfrey finally let him out of there. Scowling, he made his way to his first lesson, potions. She really hadn't needed to do that – he'd been completely fine. However, since it was Madame Pomfrey she had, of course, not listened to reason.<p>

Harry headed down the stairs leading to the dungeons and walked down the winding corridor until he reached his classroom. He pushed open the door and walked inside; immediately he sighed. Judging from the filled classroom and the look of unmasked rage on Snape's face, he was clearly late.

"Potter! Five points from Gryffindor for your tardiness!" Snape snapped, furiously.

"It's your fault anyway" Harry grumbled under his breath as he walked towards the spare seat next to Ron.

"What was that?"

He winced slightly at the sound of Snape's voice.

"Nothing, nothing" he replied, hastily.

"Two more points from Gryffindor for your cheek." Growling slightly, Harry slid into his seat. Ron was practically fuming.

"That slimy git –"

_"Ronald!" _Hermione snapped. "He is your _teacher – "_

"Doesn't mean I have to respect him" was the stubborn answer.

"Mr. Weasley! Ms. Granger! Kindly stop your lovers' quarrel and come and collect your ingredients for this lesson – take five points each for this insolence! Potter, you take five points off too!"

_"What?" _Harry spluttered. "What did I do?"

"You didn't stop their useless argument" was the cool answer. Harry felt his cheeks heating up with rage. He felt a hand on his arm and looked up to see Hermione shaking her head at him.

"Don't" she said.

Gritting his teeth, Harry stormed to the front of the classroom and collected his ingredients.

"Partner?" he asked Ron.

"Course" Ron replied.

The two boys headed back to their workbench and set the ingredients down. Chatting between each other, they began to work.

The sound of something splashing into their potion made them jump.

"Malfoy!" Ron snarled, spinning around. The blonde boy was smirking. "What the hell did you do?"

"What makes you think I did anything?" Malfoy asked in that smug tone of his.

"Don't lie you stupid ferret, you put something in our potion –"

"Mr. Weasley! Mr. Potter! What do you think you're doing?"

Harry resisted the urge to groan – Snape was back.

"Malfoy put something in our potion!" yelled Ron, pointing at the blonde with an look of accusation on his face.

"Falsely accusing people of things they haven't done?" Snape asked, scornfully. "If something like that had happened I would have noticed. Five points off each for lying to me. Now apologize to Mr. Malfoy."

Harry and Ron could only gape at him in disbelief.

"Well? I don't have all day" Snape said, impatiently. Malfoy continued to smirk, clearly enjoying what was going on.

"Sorry" spat Ron, his eyes burning with rage.

Harry gritted his teeth.

"Mr. Potter" Snape said, warningly.

Harry's muscles twitched with fury. He opened his mouth to tell Snape to shove it - not caring how much trouble he got into. However the words that came out were not what he had expected.

"Master I cannot hold him!"

Harry blinked. He had certainly _not _meant to say that.

"I didn't tell you to hold Mr. Malfoy, Potter, I simply asked you to apologize for him!" Snape bellowed. "Another two points off for your insolence!"

"Why..._why _did you just call Snape master?" Ron asked, incredulously. Harry, still shocked, could only shrug.

* * *

><p>"Mate, I <em>still <em>don't understand why you called Snape Master!" Ron exclaimed for about the millionth time.

"I don't understand either" Harry muttered. "I didn't mean to say it."

"Maybe Snape used that potion yesterday to take control of your mind!"

"Ron, don't be ridiculous!" Hermione snapped. "He couldn't have!"

"Why?" Ron asked, his tone slightly mocking. "Because he's a _teacher?"_

"Because Harry made the potion!"

"Shut up" Harry pleaded. "I really don't want to listen to your arguments, guys."

"Oh" Hermione replied, flushing slightly. "Sorry Harry."

"Yeah" Ron said. "Sorry mate."

"Never mind" Harry sighed. "I'm just annoyed about Snape."

"Slimy Git" Ron agreed. "But honestly, did you see his face when you said that? Did you see _Malfoys? _Whether you meant to say it or not, it was bloody hilarious!"

"Mmm" Harry agreed. "I'm...going to the Owlery. See you later."

As he walked off he heard Hermione snap at Ron for being so tactless. He smiled slightly and shook his head; those two would never change.

He reached his destination and headed up the steps. He thought back to what Ron had said and sighed; he hadn't meant to leave his friends like that but he didn't like that Ron had been joking about what happened in Potions. To tell the truth, it had freaked him out. He hadn't meant to say that; it had felt like he had no control over his body.

Harry looked around. He was in the Owlery and birds and feathers surrounded him. Now that he was here he didn't really know what to do; he had only come here as a means to escape.

"Harry?" said a voice from behind him. Harry's face immediately heated up; it was Cho.

"Cho" he greeted. "Fancy seeing you here."

Cho giggled.

"I needed to deliver something to my parents" she explained. "What about you?"

Harry shrugged.

"I just...wanted to see Hedwig."

Cho nodded her head and smiled. Harry felt himself smiling along with her; it was impossible not to.

Cho walked over to one of the Hogwarts Owls and attached the letter she was holding to its talons. Harry sighed dreamily as her voice sounded through his ears, telling the owl where to deliver the letter too.

"Harry?"

He peered up and then blushed, realizing that he had been staring at Cho intently for quite a while.

He opened his mouth to say something that wouldn't sound like a load of trash and make Cho think he was a complete idiot.

The words that came out were definitely, definitely, _definitely _not what he intended.

"KILL THE BOY!"

"What?" Cho squeaked, her pretty features twisting into a look of shock. Harry, his cheeks red, desperately tried to stop himself, but the words continued to spill out.

"LEAVE THE BIRD!"

"Alright, alright" Cho's voice was panicked. "I'll leave the bird...just calm down..." she slowly backed away from the owl, her eyes wide with confusion and a bit of fear.

"THE BOY IS BEHIND YOU! SNIFF HIM - SMELL HIM!"

"Harry! What's going on?"

Finally Harry managed to regain control of his speech.

"I...Cho I'm so sorry! I have no idea what just happened!"

Cho shook her head, looking slightly pale.

"I need to go Harry" she murmured. "I'll see you later." She hurried off without another word. When she was gone Harry closed his eyes and leaned against the wall, letting out a low moan.

"Why..."

"Wow Potter, aren't you a charmer." Harry gritted his teeth and opened his eyes; standing in front of him was Malfoy.

"What the hell do you want?" he yelled, angrily. "Why can't you just - my lord I prostrate myself before you, I am your most faithful - eep!" Harry clamped a hand over his mouth, his eyes wide. Why was this happening?

"What the hell Potter? You freak!" Malfoy yelled, getting over his shock. Harry ignored him and took off out of the Owelry. He needed to get away and speak to Hermione. She was the genius; she might be able to help him...

"HERMIONE!" he yelled when he spotted her. She turned around, looking surprised and then worried when she saw the panicked look on his face.

"Harry? Is everything alright?" she asked.

"Mate, you look real pale." Ron commented.

"You won't let them kill me will you Ron? You're on my side, aren't you?" Harry squeezed his eyes shut, mentally screaming. Ron looked bewildered.

"What?"

"I'm sorry" Harry moaned. "Something's wrong with me...I keep blurting these things out...I can't stop myself...

Hermione's face morphed into a look of concern.

"Oh Harry...you should have said something! I'm sure it's just an after affect of that potion!"

Harry blinked.

"Uhh...what?" he asked. "How do you know that?"

"I don't" Hermione replied. "I assume it is though. After all, it would explain the odd behavior."

"You know mate" Ron looked thoughtful. "What you just said to me...it's exactly what Wormtail said to me back in Third Year."

Hermione considered this.

"Perhaps the potion...perhaps it's making you say things your enemies have said in the past? Like...replaying parts from your worst memories? That could be possible."

"Maybe" Harry said, looking uncertain. "I -"

"Mr. Potter. Mr. Weasley. Ms. Granger. Five points from Gryffindor each."

The three friends spun around to see Snape standing behind them.

"Wha - we didn't do anything wrong!" Ron exclaimed, indignantly.

"You were keeping important things to yourselves" Snape replied, coolly. "You should have come to a teacher with your problem. It was a stupid move and so I took points off from you. And that's another two points, Weasley, for back-talking to a professor."

Ron spluttered in rage.

"Now, head to class you lot, lunch is almost over" he turned to stride away. Before he rounded the corner he stopped briefly. Without turning around he said "Oh, and by the way Potter - the effects of the potion should run out in another hour or so."

Then he was gone.

Harry, Ron and Hermione all stared after him, their mouths hanging open.

"...Slimy Git" Ron said after a moment.

Harry opened his mouth to agree but, once again, the words that came out weren't his.

"Four years ago… the means for my return seemed assured. A wizard - young, foolish, and gullible - wandered across my path in the forest I had made my home. Oh, he seemed the very chance I had been dreaming of… for he was a teacher at Dumbledore's school… he was easy to bend to my will… he brought me back to this country, and after a while, I took possession of his body, to supervise him closely as he carried out my orders. But my plan failed. I did not manage to steal the Philosopher's Stone. I was not to be assured immortal life. I was thwarted… thwarted, once again, by Harry Potter…"

Hermione and Ron gaped at him. Harry flushed.

"What?" he asked, biting his lip in embarrassment.

"...Mate. Maybe you shouldn't speak for the next hour or so..."

"RON! DON'T BE SO TACTLESS!" Hermione yelled. "Have some sympathy for Harry will you!"

As his friends resumed their fight, Harry shook his head and smiled. They could be very annoying at times, yet he wouldn't have it any other way.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:<strong>

**I hope you enjoyed this fic. I had this idea for a while but I never really got around to using it...**

**...Review and tell me what you thought. Also check out my fic 'Marrying Your Worst Enemy.'**

**XOXO - Nat.**


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